” My soul is overwhelmed with sorrow to the point of death, Stay here and keep watch over me.”
Temptation is everywhere. Its hangs around in the most likely places, and what does temptation do to us? Makes us fall prey to people, things and ideas that are not healthy for us. Temptation can come in many forms to us, and at times it come like a sweet cherry pie. Sometimes it is slow process that slowly spreads through our spiritual vain until it poisons us to death. At church today I learned something surprising about myself, I have been tempted by many things this past year. My souls reaction when the temptation was cut from my life? To be overwhelmed with sorrow to the point of death. The spirit is willing, but the body is weak. There are times when the mind tells you something is wrong but the body does not acknowledge the signals to run away. The Lord puts many “tests” in our way to see how we will respond to them. Prayer is what gives us the strength to overcome temptation and sorrow.
This past week has had some ups and downs. Everyday I am getting a little bit stronger and a little bit more wiser to the ways of the world. This breakup has taught me so much about myself and what I really want in my life. What do it want in this life? Well I’m still analyzing this as I go through the stages of finding myself again. I make sure to tell you dear reader what it is soon. Since I have been unemployed before, I have had to fight more this time than ever to get the right to have unemployment benefits I deserve. The process is not over until I find another position in a lab. I am thinking of trying to keep my job for at least a few years before moving on to another. Amazing how a company can lie to keep money in their hands instead of paying for a worker who was wronged by their process. In the end, I want to find a job as soon as possible.
Since a lot of places around here has some memory of Dennis and I’s relationship, I had to get away from it for two days. I escaped to a family friend’s house for a while. I wanted to get some perspective on my life and the calmness of knowing how things were before a relationship. I need the distraction, I need the comfort of another person whose life was not intertwined with Dennis’s. I made cookies for the first time in a long time. I watched two movies I would never had seen if it was not for someone suggesting it. I saw Bridesmaids and Hang Over Two. I did yard work with family, and found how much I missed doing things out-of-doors in the winter. There has been a lull in my life for a while, a missing part that needs to be found again.